The department store makes returns easy. All that you need is the product along with the receipt. I went back with my Velcro and the receipt, and went to the refund and exchange desk, where I asked the young woman wearing a Guest Relations badge: "I need to exchange this. Do you have the Velcro with adhesive backing?"

What would an acceptable customer-friendly response be? Well, to start, directions to the right product would help. After all, this was a large department store. A clear set of directions -- "It's on aisle 26, halfway down on the left," would have been most helpful.

Another customer-oriented action would be to ask a coworker to take me to the aisle. This would be a genuine gesture of caring. I have had occasions in this store when I've searched for something in a wrong aisle and a clerk has voluntarily walked me to the right location.

Another alternative would be for the young woman to respond to my question with a smile and, "Gee, I don't know if we have that type of Velcro. Let me look that up." After all, she was standing next to a spanking new computer, which presumably allowed her to search the store's inventory.

And, even if the computer did not have that capability, she could have said,"I donít know, but let me ask someone for you." There was a telephone next to the computer, and coworkers nearby whom she could have asked.

There were plenty of other good responses too, but unfortunately this particular Guest Relations person didn't think of them. Without even looking at me she said, "I don't know," and began to fill out a refund form, as if a refund was what I wanted.

I could have said, "Could you check with someone who might know?" Customers are certainly allowed to make suggestions like that. However, not all customers are ready to offer on-the-job training. In fact, studies show that most customers who receive rude or uncaring treatment like I did simply walk away, in search of a store where they'll be treated better.

Which is what I did, after she counted out my money and whined about how cold her hands were. My parting thought was that it wasn't just her hands that were cold it was her whole attitude.